Bride and Groom Can't Agree on Wedding Plans So They've Decided to Throw Their Own Separate Events

A bride and groom can't agree on the size of their wedding — so they've decided to each plan their own event.

In a post on Reddit's "Wedding Shaming" forum, a user shared that their sister-in-law and her fiancé are getting married this summer but have different visions for their nuptials.

"She wants a small wedding, he wants a big wedding," the user explained. "Instead of compromising or working together, they’re each having their own wedding. They each have their own venue, staff hired, etc."

For the bride, they will celebrate a small, "bougie" destination wedding about "six to seven hours" away in the mountains, while the groom gets his dream of a big affair "with a ton of people" which will be held close to home. They have even set up two separate gift registries, and they expect their family to attend both events.

"We thought it was crazy to have two, but they said they couldn’t afford to have all the people they wanted at the first [destination] wedding, so they’re having another they can afford to bring everyone to," the user wrote. "When they were over for Christmas, we asked about why two weddings and that was the explanation they gave us."

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The Reddit user couldn't help but question the couple's decision to have what they described as "his and hers" weddings.

"They seem to be a solid relationship, but this seems to counteract the whole idea of marriage? Like if it’s about both of you joining together, why are you each having your own separate thing? Please tell me I’m not delusional," the user added, seeking opinions.

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In the comments, many people pointed out that the situation actually isn't uncommon, as some couples choose to have a small destination wedding before hosting a bigger reception at home. However, Redditors were a bit thrown by the couple framing the two events as his-and-her weddings, especially considering some loved ones are expected to attend both.

“She’s getting her small destination wedding and he’s getting his big wedding,” one commenter wrote. “I personally think it’s kind of silly, but I’m not young and footing the bill! Lol! All the best to them, but I sure would not be attending both weddings.”

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“Not usual, but it's their money, you know?” another person chimed in. “I wouldn't comment on the idea of two weddings, just for the sake of family harmony, but I would decide which one I wanted to attend. And buy gifts for.”

Another commenter shared their personal experience, writing that having two weddings was the “best thing” they ever did. "One was for the obligatory family. One was for our friends to have fun at,” they explained. “Everyone walked away happy.”

Yet another Reddit user said the second wedding should “just be a party” without a “pretend” ceremony.

“This concept of his and hers is even more bizarre. People need to stop enabling such entitled people by respectfully declining to attend these over-the-top events,” they wrote. “It really makes a mockery of the solemn nature of a wedding.”

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