Poonami, ginwag and niplash: funny phrases parents use to cope with raising children

“Just going to stick my hair in a mum bun while I deal with a poonami and sort out the threenager before popping out for a ginwag!” Sound familiar? It likely will if you’re a parent.

A new survey has revealed the top twenty funniest phrases most used by modern mums and dads who are turning to humour to help them navigate parenthood.

According to the research by parenting site ChannelMum.com the quirky words are frequently used by 84% of parents to help them cope (read: survive) raising their kids.

Four in five parents say terms such as ‘threenager’, think a three-year-old throwing a teenage-style strop, lightens the mood when they find parenting tough.

But 35% admit to using the secret slang so their little one doesn’t understand what they really mean. Genius!

Overall the most-used quirky parenting phrase is ‘Mum Bun’, the term cheekily used to describe the hairstyle where harassed mums pull their hair into a topknot, used by three quarters of parents.

Meanwhile ‘poonami’, the secret code for a baby’s explosive poo, is favoured by two thirds of mums and dads navigating the nappy change.

Three quarters of parents admit to frequently ‘winging it’ ie trying to cope with the parenting journey, even though others seem way more organised.

The food they feed their little ones hasn’t escaped the phrase coining either with ‘Beige rainbow’ and ‘Freezer tapas’ being used by one in five families to describe ready-made play date food such as chicken nuggets and chips.

And half of mamas describe themselves as a ‘mombie’, a mum who looks like a zombie through lack of sleep.

Other popular mottos include ‘ginwag’ meaning catching up over a glass of gin, while an ‘adult headache’ or hangover likely follows the next day. Face palm!

A quarter of parents fess up to ‘iparenting’ by giving kids a tablet device to keep quiet, alongside one in nine who have a ‘mum spa’ when they open the dishwasher from the steam.

‘Velcro baby’ is used by 23% to describe a clingy child who won’t be put down and 18% say ‘niplash’ to describe the pain when a breastfeeding baby twists their head without letting go of your nipple.

Top 20 Parenting Phrases

1. Mum bun – mum hairstyle

2. Winging It – doing your best when everyone else seems to be more organised

3. Poonami – poo explosion

4. Threenager – 3 going on 13.

5. Sniff test – checking if the baby really needs a change

6. Mombie – mum exhausted through lack of sleep

7. Flying Solo – coping on your own

8. Mumboss – mum in charge

9. Going to bed early – sex

10. The Handover – passing the baby to your partner as soon as they get home

11. Velcro Baby – clingy baby

12. iParenting – using a tablet to keep your child quiet

13. Niplash – when a breastfeeding baby twists their head without letting go of your nipple

14. Freezer Tapas – serving up whatever you can find in the freezer

15. Adult headache – hangover

16. Musical beds – when kids change beds all night long

17. Beige Rainbow – ready-made playdate food like chicken nuggets and chips

18. Mum spa – opening the dishwasher

19. Deja poo – when the baby fills the nappy for the 20th time that day

20. Ginwag – catching up on the gossip over a glass of gin

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