15 People Who Hooked Up With, Dated, Or Married Their Cousins

In the United States circa 2024, cousins dating or marrying each other is pretty taboo. Of course, in many cultures around the world (and in some cultural groups here in the United States), it is historically more commonplace.

Still, relationships of this kind are unusual in the U.S. — and something I’ve never personally encountered — so I asked members of the BuzzFeed Community who have encountered them to share their stories. Here’s what they had to say:

1."My fiancé’s parents were second cousins, and his cousins also married each other! To be fair, he is part of a small ethnic community/church in the U.S., which stayed very insular until his generation. His parents met when they were seven at a big church community party and grew up together, spending almost every holiday, wedding, baby shower, and funeral together. They finally started dating in high school and married after college. They had my fiancé and his younger brother and continued in the same community. THEN, there was a wedding to which the extended family of both my fiancé’s mother AND father were invited. His mother’s nephew and father’s niece met at this wedding and are now happily married with two kids. Yay, family closeness?"

"(P.S. My fiancé and I are in NO WAY related…just in case that wasn’t clear)."

—anonymous

2."My father’s parents were first cousins. Three generations later, we have seen no issues."

—anonymous

3."My great-grandparents were first cousins, married in the 1930s. That's definitely not unheard of...but it's not great. Technically, my sister and I are fourth cousins, and my dad is my third cousin once removed. Even weirder is that I'm technically also my own fourth cousin. The older I get, the more I think it was about keeping assets in the family. When my grandpa died (my great-grandparents' son), we all had a chuckle when the funeral director asked what his mother's maiden name was. It was the same as her married name. Luckily, the funeral director said it was somewhat common in the area. Even now when I have a health issue or something weird going on, I blame it on 'the inbreeding.'"

—anonymous

4."My coworker married her second cousin. It was no secret; they knew they were related, and so was the entire family. Together, they had two kids; one became a doctor, and the other is mentally challenged and lives in an assisted living facility. Their divorce was wild. We were cops, and she kept telling her husband that she was working late until he found her uniform in her closet when she was supposed to be working. She was cheating on him for months, and when they divorced, she claimed that he was an abusive father (he wasn't), and it tore the family apart."

—anonymous

5."I knew two first cousins who married each other. Not only that, but they also tried to have a kid. Sadly, the baby didn’t live, but just imagine trying to explain the family dynamic to a kid. Their marriage didn’t last, but maybe that was for the best."

—anonymous

6."My aunt and uncle are second cousins. 40+ years ago, in a non-Western country, no one was bothered. Today, it's mostly a trivia point for new acquaintances and to freak out the young 'uns."

—anonymous

7."My in-laws are first cousins. I was so confused when my husband told me this when we were dating. Although it wasn't unheard of in our culture in the older generations, it was still strange. His mother has two brothers who married women who are sisters. The kicker is they're all first cousins too. These marriages weren't arranged either, purely by choice. It's super odd, but all their kids turned out fine. That was always a concern for me because of the possibility of complications with inbreeding."

—anonymous

8."It's common knowledge in my family that my maternal grandparents are first cousins. There were only six people in their graduating class in high school, and they started dating right away. Apparently, nobody cared in the 1940s. It's only weird at family reunions because my grandpa's sister looks JUST like my grandma. Also, having both sides of the family at the same reunion is weird. My daughter has genetic abnormalities, and I've always wondered if that's connected to their relationship."

—anonymous

9."Not myself but a girl I grew up with. We were never particularly close, but I knew her by association. Everyone thought her relationship with her male cousin was a little odd but not odd enough for anyone to suspect incest. A couple of years after we graduated, I was picking up a few things from the store and saw her. We made small talk, and that’s when she told me she got married right after graduation…to her male cousin. They were first cousins, not even third or fourth cousins. (We live in South Carolina, where this is unfortunately 100% legal.)"

—anonymous

10."I was 19 at the time. In 1999, my family and I took a trip to a Caribbean island for a family reunion. While there, I went out to the local area to explore and met a young lady. We flirted a bit and ended up hooking up back at her aunt's place. We made plans to meet up at the same diner a few nights later. Cut to the next evening of said family reunion, and guess who happens to be there? It turns out we are cousins. We both chatted, laughed about it, and decided it was already too late. We ended up hooking up a few times on that trip and once more back in the States. We don't have much contact these days, but whenever we do see each other, we just smile and don't bring up the past."

—anonymous

11."My partner's ex-wife is also his first cousin. I find this repugnant. I didn't even know this for the first couple of years of our relationship; I think he deliberately kept quiet about it. His mother told me while we were having a general conversation. When I asked him about it, he originally said that she was his second cousin but then admitted that she was his first cousin, so I think he knows it isn't really right, or perhaps he has been previously judged. I didn't bring the subject up for years, but then, during an argument, I told him that I thought that it was repugnant. He didn't really respond. I will never understand why someone could want a sexual or romantic relationship with a first cousin, as I see it as only slightly better than such a relationship with a sibling."

—anonymous

12."Not me, but my good (but not great) friend. She dated her cousin, who was FIVE YEARS OLDER THAN HER. Five years isn't much of an age gap, but she was SEVENTEEN WHILE HE WAS TWENTY TWO. It was a very rocky relationship. She was still living with her parents and in high school while he was in college. Apparently, they made plans to run away together, so he dropped out of college and her high school. I remember a couple of other friends and me begging her not to, saying that this was HER COUSIN and she was SEVENTEEN. The good thing was that we convinced her not to, but they stayed together."

"The weirdest part about this is that he would come to our high school to hang out with her...when he was 22. He proposed, and their family was not happy about it at all. It ended with people getting disowned and yelling, and to this day, when they walk past their used-to-be family members, the family members play "Sweet Home Alabama." I used to feel bad, but now I kind of don't because they friggin' did this to themselves. They filed for divorce in October of this year because of a 'lack of intimacy.'"

—anonymous

13."My mom met her first husband as a teenager and got pregnant at 15 with my older brother. My mom and brother's dad decided (with lots of pressure from their church and his family) that it was 'best' for them to get married before my brother was born, so that's what they did. Turns out, my grandmother had not been truthful with my mom about who her biological father was. After the news of the pregnancy/marriage broke, my grandmother decided to reveal her secret about my mom's paternity — my mom and brother's dad turned out to be distant cousins. Not that any relation is great, but at least they weren't first or second cousins, I guess? My mom and brother's dad divorced not long after my brother was born for that and many other reasons."

"Thankfully, my brother was born relatively healthy. He is in his early 30s now. My mom didn't meet her biological dad until she was 25."

—anonymous

14."My cousin married his cousin from the other side of the family. This happened after his future wife was orphaned and moved in with my cousin's family. So basically, they grew up like siblings. We live in a place where cousins are already viewed as siblings, but their literally growing up together really hammered that nail home. As far as marriages go, it's one of the most intense, toxic marriages I've seen. The kids are definitely affected, and I think they should have therapy if they can. But despite alcoholism, physical violence, affairs, and even car chases at night trying to run each other off the road...they've also been together forever."

"Sometimes, they're just living normal, quiet days like any other family. The wife pokes fun at her marriage, and she is a riot to have around, though, so... *Shrugs* They also run a pretty good laundry business together. Either way, it still weirds me out when I think about it too long."

—n48656c421

15."My brother has been in a relationship with our first cousin for about 20 years. Thankfully, they are not married and have no children, but their relationship is very toxic and dysfunctional. I’m creeped out by the whole thing, but everyone in the family acts like it’s perfectly normal. They share a grandma...ffs. It’s fully repulsive to me that nobody bats an eye, but he’s always been the golden child and can do no wrong. I don’t talk to him anymore."

—anonymous