Farrah Has a Horrible Fit and Lashes Out at Her Daughter on "Teen Mom OG"
Welcome back to Teen Mom OG, which is really hitting its stride this season. If you thought last week was a little low on drama, this week had enough to give you life until next Monday when (hopefully) at least some of it will be resolved.
What did you miss if you were getting one last drink on before summer was officially over? Oh, not too much. Well, maybe a little. Catelynn bought a pig (no, you're not having a stroke), Amber's daughter developed a scary voice straight out of The Shining, and Farrah, well, Farrah is 100 percent terrible.
But wait, let's start with Maci. (You know why.)
Maci
Listen, in a world of complete chaos and Farrah getting new highlights every week (they look good though), it's nice to know that there's one Teen Mom star who will always be a constant. On this episode, Maci continued her streak of being chill and responsible by finding a wedding venue, taking Taylor to visit it, and securing the space for her upcoming October nuptials.
That's all great (and really happy Maci's grandpa can officiate), but the best moment of Maci's scrapbook chapter this episode was when Taylor asked her if she could get a wedding dress with a yoga pant bottom. That's a terrible idea, I thought, and then immediately pinged the best artist I know (my friend David Pemberton) to draw up just what that might look like.
What do you think? Yep, it's hideous - although very regal - and you should absolutely expect it on the runways in 2017. You've been warned.
(Bye, Maci!)
Catelynn
This week started on a high note for Catelynn, who bought herself a micro mini pig online to make herself feel better? Find another living thing to take care of even though she's got Nova? I don't know. All I know is that Tyler was piiiiiiiiiiiiiissed because the pig cost $3,000 and he's trying to get their new house in order.
But Catelynn's unwise decision (BTW, there's no such thing as a mini pig, so please don't buy one. It will only end in heartbreak) was only the beginning of her troubles. When she returned home, she freaked out because she realized that the pig was going to be too much work. And then she handed the pig over to her sister and suffered what appeared to be a nervous breakdown in front of Tyler and their producer.
The thing with Catelynn is you can tell how hard she is trying. As someone who's struggled with depression for most of my life, I can tell you that finding something, anything to hold on to when you're really down can seem like it's the secret to getting out of the hole and on your way to being better. Usually, though, it doesn't end up working in the way that you would expect, leading to more heartbreak.
That's why I don't feel Catelynn was being selfish or greedy or stupid or any of the other words that will likely be used to describe her these coming days. She simply found something she was sure would help her and then discovered (heartbreakingly) that it wouldn't. And that caused even more problems, because she was suddenly even more depressed than before. It's not her fault, but she definitely needs help, so it's great that she's thinking about going to Arizona to figure her stuff out.
Before anyone accuses her of being a bad mom for bailing and taking care of herself first, please remember that Catelynn is doing this so she can be a good mom. It's better for Nova to have her there when she's doing better, and if that means leaving for a few weeks, that means leaving for a few weeks.
Amber
Matt's redemption tour continues and it's not working. On the last episode, he took Amber to visit his long-lost family (completely not staged by producers or anything) and on this one, he gave in when she begged to adopt a rescue cat who is frightened of people and difficult to live with (man, Amber, there's a lot of psychological stuff to unpack here). (Also, Matt's looking good, so at least there's that!)
Aside from having cat problems, Amber's also got a lot of stuff to talk to Leah about. For some reason, Amber has been in the hospital a lot, meaning that she's been missing time with Leah. That sucks, but it's also understandable. It's unfortunate, however, that walking Ed Hardy billboard Gary Shirley and his (very) passive-aggressive wife haven't been more kind to Amber. Gary tells her that he told Leah that Amber was in the hospital, but considering that Leah told Amber that she didn't know that, I'm willing to bet Gary either didn't mention it or did so very, very quietly.
The only person truly suffering, of course, is Leah. She can't even have a conversation with her mom! And when she tries to talk about serious issues, she adopts a "Danny isn't here" voice that's both creepy and very, very sad. I hope she's got a good therapist. And I hope that therapist is telling both her parents she should probably not be on this show anymore. I also hope that Amber continues getting it together (although she's looking great!)
Farrah
Oh man, you guys, buckle in because Farrah. Is. Awful. No, there's no discussion about that. It's not a matter of opinion or editing, or any sort of personal dislike toward her. It's just that her treatment of the people around her - namely Sophia and Simon - is so atrocious that MTV should be paying for counseling for whoever accidentally wanders into Farrah's orbital field.
Where to start? Is it the anger with which Farrah beats the hell out of a piñata for children, nearly injuring Sophia in the process? Is it all the yelling she does at Simon for god knows what reason? Is it the fact that Sophia and Simon, two people who had previously never bonded, only had a moment of connection when they both agreed that Farrah was too much?
The episode opened with Sophia being sick but also being forced to go to an Easter egg hunt she didn't want to be a part of. The poor kid was trying to get some sleep, but here comes Farrah, yelling and screaming and demanding that the 7-year-old get up and get dressed. The result? Sophia first locking herself in the bathroom and then hitting things with a chair. I swear if I weren't watching Teen Mom, I would absolutely consider her feral.
But that's not Sophia's fault! The fault lies completely with her mother, who doesn't understand how medicine works (no, it won't automatically make you feel better), calls Sophia stupid, and then drags her up a staircase when she doesn't want to cooperate. When even Debra sounds sane and reasonable - she tries to talk Farrah out of taking Sophia to the egg hunt - you know there's something very, very wrong.
"It's ridiculous how she's acting," Farrah says. Nah, man; what's ridiculous is that you don't get that she is a child and also sick. How else do you want her to behave when she feels terrible? How does that shot of Sophia staring wistfully out the window not break your heart?
But wait, that's not all: Simon's here and he's getting it from both Farrah and Debra. Why? Because he asked if dogs can go on a trampoline (amazing question), accidentally walked on Farrah's rug, and also didn't engage with kids as much as he could have at the Easter egg hunt? I don't know. None of these seem like real issues. The real issue seems to be that Farrah is so mean that Simon can't even with her. (He does goad her on, to be fair.)
Farrah's story culminates in a huge blowout with Simon, whom she accuses of not having any "socialism" skills before threatening to throw his stuff to the curb (which she does).
"I'm putting your suitcase outside," Farrah says before demanding that Simon go to the hotel.
"It's actually in the car," he responds, which is very passive-aggressive but also kind of funny?
Farrah's producer, wearing bunny ears, tries to get Farrah to be introspective about why she's truly angry, but those attempts are completely foiled by Farrah's own delusional ideas of what's wrong; ideas that don't seem clearcut even to her. She claims she wanted to just have a discussion with Simon, but what they have isn't a discussion. Simon and Farrah aren't talking. Farrah's just berating him and not listening at all. Simon isn't great, but he doesn't deserve this.
In fact, that's the last thing I put in my notes for Farrah this week: "This isn't worth it, Simon; not even for TV." :( :( :(
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