Photo: Screenshot from YouTube
You have all seen it by now: the moment where Singapore gets nuked in the Independence Day: Resurgence trailer, alongside major cities like London and Dubai. Which is really cool, even though Singapore apparently only consists of the Marina Bay area (the heartlands must have been sucked into a black hole).
This is not the first time the Central Business District has been devastated - Jack Neo was the first to do it in Ah Boys To Men, and it was also the scene of a firefight in Hitman: Agent 47.
But how else can our sunny little island be destroyed, and can the heartlands be included too? Let us count the ways.
1. Kaiju invasion
The SAF realised too late that their budget should have included Jaegers Gif: Randar.com
In Pacific Rim, the last of the Jaeger units are moved to the Shatterdome in Hong Kong, where humanity will make its last stand. As anyone who has ever had to sit through a social studies class can attest, Singapore’s geographical location makes it an ideal hub for many things - including a Jaeger base.
So bring your Jaegers here, major world powers. Singapore is ever ready to be moved by an inspirational speech exhorting us to cancel the apocalypse - providing it’s delivered by Idris Elba.
2. Zombie apocalypse
“Is this covered under Medisave?” Gif: instinctualization.tumblr.com
Don’t tell us the thought of hordes of zombies overrunning the island doesn’t give you a little chill down your spine. We are even willing to bet that some of you have already packed your go-to bag - bottled water, canned food, parang, etc - for the day that the media starts reporting the spread of a mysterious virus.
Make sure you log on to Yahoo Singapore, so you can be updated on the coming zombie apocalypse. Right before the Internet connection goes out.
3. Supervillain takes over
The crowd at the S-League game was suspiciously large Gif: Tumblr
In 2015, Forbes reported that there were a total of 26 billionaires in Singapore. It is deeply, deeply disappointing that none of them have chosen to build a secret lair, put on a costume and fight crime.
This also means that when a Joker or Bane-like villain finally rises up and takes over the country, there will be no one left to resist him. Where is the hero we need, not the one we deserve? #weep
4. Alien invasion
The new ERP system wasn’t working out. Gif: followatch.tumblr.com
Aliens have invaded Earth time and again, from War of the Worlds to Signs to Starship Troopers. Yet somehow, they have always managed to miss Singapore. Where’s the equality, aliens? Are you too good for us, huh?
Fortunately, this is all about to change in the Independence Day sequel. here’s hoping Chin Han will save us all.
5. Transformers run riot
“Bad dog!” Gif: IGN
We know this makes no sense. But hey, neither do any of the Transformers movies. Come at us, Michael Bay! Just make sure the Transformers all pay for their COEs first.
6. Robots rising up
With Singapore being a tech hub and all, it is clearly just a matter of time before the machines rise up and kill us all. Where is Singapore’s Sarah Connor? The 1990′s version I mean, not the Khaleesi version.
7. New Ice Age
Given Singapore’s position near the Equator, the likelihood of another Ice Age in Singapore is about as likely as, well, any of the previous six scenarios. But if it means Chris Evans - who starred in Snowpiercer - comes to save Singapore, I’m all for it.