"I Couldn't Make That Shit Up": 21 Juicy And Surprising Confessions From A Former Cruise Ship Employee
Recently, on the subreddit r/AMA [Ask Me Anything], a former cruise ship worker answered questions about their experience on board and below deck, and it was equal parts informative and entertaining. Here are some of the top questions and the juiciest answers:
1.Q: What did you do? Which position and rank?
A: I worked in the shops. No rank, lol.
2.Q: Do you feel that workers are compensated adequately for the hours they are expected to put in? Not just shop workers but cleaning, maintenance, etc.
A: No. The money is not great. But the experience is worth it. You get medical when on ship but not on land. You get fed and a bed. It's not for everyone. I'm glad I did it, but I wouldn't make it a lifelong career.
3.Q: Do you have any insider secrets that most guests don’t know about?
A: Don't book cruises via a travel agent. Book directly with the cruise company. Also, book your excursions on land and never through the ship. If you don't mind you can book an empty crew cabin for a lot less, but no balcony or windows. This is great for short cruises (Caribbean and Europe) where you won't be on the ship too much.
4.Q: Does it turn into one big orgy after hours below deck?
A: No. But staff fuck each other. Passengers fuck each other. With the crew, it's constant because you are with the same people all the time.
5.Q: You ever hear of passengers and crew hooking up with each other?
A: Yup. It happens quite a bit. Or get a shore bunny, lol.
6.Q: Is it true that if a passenger dies at sea the body is stored in the fridge until you reach land?
A: Haha, yeah, but it's not a fridge. Every ship has a jail and a morgue. The jail is a small windowless cabin. The morgue is a room where dry ice is stored. That's how the body is kept cold.
7.Q: How often does the jail get used?
A: A lot. It's also the unofficial drunk tank, lol.
8.Q: Did you trust the quality of the buffet/restaurant food?
A: Yes. It's like restaurant food prep.
9.Q: Weirdest thing left behind by a guest?
A: A mannequin head with a blunt in the mouth, lol. We named it Blunty and kept it as a joke.
10.Q: Do retired/older people really attend back-to-back cruises as a retirement and/or plan on passing away on the ship?
A: Yup. Just need the proper paperwork, and the captains got your back. There are a lot of weddings and burials at sea.
11.Q: Do you have friends/familiars from other cruise lines to compare notes with? Who has it worse? Who was where you might want to go (if at all)?
A: Royal Caribbean Cruise Line is good. Most people hated Disney — too many rules. Holland America is typically older people, so it can get super boring. Carnival is the party ship — mostly younger crowd but too many drunks, lol.
12.Q: Did you ever get bored of your workplace? Did the excitement of it wear off quickly?
A: It can get boring, but you're at sea for six months. Then off for two to three, then back again. You don't always do the same route
13.Q: During the six months, do you work five days a week or every day? In your off time, do y'all get to use the ship's amenities (swimming pool, buffet, shuffleboard, etc.)?
A: Seven days a week. Yes, the crew has their own gym, but you can use the pool, spa, etc. You can't eat the passenger buffet. The crew has their own spot below deck to eat. But if your day off is a port day, go enjoy the culture.
14.Q: Favorite place you've been to?
A: Picton, New Zealand (Gorgeous spot. So quiet. Nice locals, and THE best fish and chips ever) and Singapore.
15.Q: The only cruises that I have been on, there were Americans and other English speakers that had the customer-facing jobs, and then there was the ship crew that was usually hired from the ship's port of origin. Did all of the crew hang out and live together, or was there a class system on the boats based on your job?
A: No, we all hung out together. I mean everyone had their little clique, but it was good.
16.Q: How disgusting is it for passengers? There's very little time for the crew to properly clean the ship between cruises.
A: Oh no, they clean. That's why housekeeping is the worst job on the ship. Always cleaning.
17.Q: Does the cruise ship hire felons? Or do you know if any of your coworkers had criminal records?
A: They do background checks. You can't work for the cruise industry if you have a felony, as felons can't get into most countries.
18.Q: Wildest thing you ever saw?
A: A guy so drunk he tried to jump into the ocean to punch a dolphin. I couldn't make that shit up.
19.Q: How common is it for a passenger to live full-time on a ship?
A: Honestly, not common. The internet makes it seem that way, but you'd need $$$$ to do that.
20.Q: Any scary experiences?
A: Yeah, we went through the tail end of a cyclone in the South Pacific. Terrifying.
21.Q: How did your living situation work while not on the ship? Did you keep an apartment or house while you were working?
A: I had an apartment with a roommate at first. Then, a house that my fam would watch over.
Have you ever worked on a cruise ship or taken a cruise? Share your experiences in the comments!
