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This woman penned an essay on why women should be “more selfish,” and it’s glorious

This woman penned an essay on why women should be “more selfish,” and it’s glorious
This woman penned an essay on why women should be “more selfish,” and it’s glorious

Moving further into adulthood inevitably means there are more things to do, more people to see, and less time for all the stuff we actually WANT to do that makes us blissfully happy.

Jenna Birch penned an essay for Vogue called “Why Is It So Hard for Women to Be Selfish?” that encourages women to take a step back.

After describing how adopting “too many roles with too many people” tested her “ability to stay sane,” Birch admitted that she became mentally exhausted from it all. Then, while she was attempting to write a book while also be there for every single person in her life, she realized something crucial. “Energy is finite, I reasoned, and it takes a lot to do your best work.” So she revamped her life.

“I dove into a new “phone off” writing routine. When people started to ask for spots in my calendar again, I paused before accepting. I passed every person and invitation under a microscope, making instinctive decisions. Who was helping me grow, inspiring me to do my best, and consistently supportive? I gravitated to those people. Who had a record of sucking me down a rabbit hole of drama and exhaustion? I sidelined these friends; a few had to go immediately.”

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Of course, it can be difficult to be this clean-cut when it comes to life and relationships, but we TOTALLY get what Birch is saying. We simply can’t be everything for everyone all the time, and if you find yourself being pulled in too many different directions, it might be time to step back and reevaluate if you’re getting what you need.

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It’ll probably be uncomfortable or feel selfish at first (Birch admitted she felt that way when she started setting limits). But she also recognized that it’s all about self-preservation. We can’t give the best advice to our friends if we don’t feel the best inside, therefore taking time to be our best selves — however that manifests itself — is a necessity.

And there’s no better time than the present to make a necessary change. Happy Monday!