It’s no secret that women can fake orgasms. The moaning and groaning can all be part of an act. In fact, studies reveal that about 80 percent of women fake orgasm before climax, only to get the whole act over with? Yes, you read that right! All that moaning might just be hogwash.
But that is not to say that there are times when women do experience orgasm. With the contractions in your vagina, the pelvic lifting, the increased heartbeat, twitching of muscles, and even the curling of the toes or fingers, they do feel an exhilarating rush!
However, if your wife is constantly faking an orgasm–she isn’t winking at you the way she used to, she’s no longer smiling after the act, her shoulders are tense, her face is turning pink, and her lips are tight–it might be time to shift the conversation from what you like to what she likes. Till then, the faking will continue, and here’s why!
Why Do Women Fake Orgasm?
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1. To satisfy the partner
More often than not, women fake orgasm to satisfy their partners. They feel that it acts as an ego-booster to his confidence, which they readily comply with. Plus, let’s be honest, when there is a man on top and just a few seconds away from coming, it feels weird to just lay there with a blank face.
2. Insecurity is a culprit
Women fake orgasm also because they don’t want to upset their partners. They may want to avoid the unpleasant consequences of a disappointing lovemaking session. And all women know that husbands or their partners surely done’t want to hear “It was appalling and tedious” after the “So how was it for you?” question!
3. Turns her on
Interestingly, some women fake orgasm because it turns them on. How many times have you tried faking it because you wanted to arouse yourself? The mantra is to fake it till you make it (for real)!
4. She’s just tired, guys!
Yes, sometimes sex is simply a chore. With no desire to dampen your mood, women may decide to go with the flow. While at it, chances are that they fake it just so it is over.
Now, if you just thought to yourself if that moaning in the night was fake or real, worry not, you’re not alone. Many of you might be thinking about the same. The good news however, is that you can change this. If you want to make sex a truly enjoyable experience, you need to tell your partner about your discomforts and what is working and not working for the both of you.
How To Have A Healthy Sex Life, Without Fake Orgasms!
1. Start open conversations
You can choose to ask your partner why they may have been faking it. The best way to make sex more pleasurable is by creating an honest and communication-driven relationship. You can also offer solutions or suggestions to make it better. But all this while, reassure your partner of your love and willingness to work towards her desires as well.
2. Guide your partner
You may not like the fact that she is faking it, but if she is, its indicative of the work you need to put into your relationship and in bed. You can guide your partner and share each other’s desires and fantasies. Try new poses or even rooms for that matter. Most importantly, guide her to also understand why she needs to be open about her fantasies too.
3. Physically help your wife have orgasm
Masters and Johnson wrote a book in which he stated that there are four stages of the sexual response:
Excitement. Initially being turned on.
Plateau. Repetitive motion that feels pleasurable.
Orgasm. The burst of pleasure, and release.
Resolution. The refractory period.
How about you give this a shot?
4. Spend more time on foreplay
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Foreplay is extremely important to her. Your wife may need plenty of physical and emotional stimulation to feel aroused. So go ahead and explore the right way.
Mental stimulation: For some women, mental stimulation works. You will be surprised that just a sexy note can sometimes do wonders.
Touch her gently: Sometimes a gentle touch can create sexual tension before you go any further. Hug her, hold her hand, or touch her where she feels the most aroused (you should know this by now!).
Talk dirty: If your wife likes talking dirty, go ahead and try that. Communicate in between to see if it is making her comfortable and she wants to go ahead with it.
Sex toys: You can use sex toys like a vibrator to arouse her before you get to the main act.
5. Know her spots well
There are two places on her body that are critical to female orgasm. If you learn to stimulate them you can help her achieve orgasm.
The clitoris This tiny organ has a high concentration of nerve endings and can be found near the top of the vulva. You will need to touching or lick the clitoris to make her feel aroused.
The G-spot: This other orgasmic area is located inside the vagina. It’s a bundle of nerve endings about two inches up from the pubic bone on the inner, upper wall of the vagina. Explore different techniques to stimulate her G-spot and ask your partner which one she likes best.
Signs That Your Wife Isn’t Faking, Anymore!
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Orgasm helps to trigger emotional releases or a sense of euphoria. And if you tried all the ideas we just shared, chances are you on the right track. But how can you know that for sure? Here are some signs which you will experience when you both have a real orgasm.
Tingly sensation: When you climax, you will first experience a tingly sensation and then the muscles begin to contract.
Body shakes: You may also feel that your body will shake when you orgasm, especially the lower body.
Heartbeat increases: The more closer you are to your orgasm, the more your heartbeat will rise.
The important thing in sexual intimacy is to infuse excitement at each level and communicate with each other. A woman’s body is like a hidden mystery, there is a lot to explore, not only for your partner but also for you.