Kris Aquino recalls Herbert Bautista's marriage proposal

Kris Aquino and Quezon City mayor and ex-boyfriend Herbert Bautista (NPPA Images) (NPPA Images)

Kris Aquino revealed that she travelled a lot from April 5, 2014 to February 2015, not just for work,  but because she needed to mend her broken heart after Quezon City mayor Herbert Bautista proposed to her, only to break up with her a few days after.

The TV host-actress went to Hong Kong, Thailand, US and Japan because she  also “needed new memories” to replace the good ones her heart was still holding on to.

Kris recalled in her blog how hurt she was when her special someone, whose name she didn’t reveal, proposed to her, only to take back what he said a few days after.

Herbert Bautista

Many people assume the unnamed guy is Quezon City Mayor Herbert Bautista, with whom she had a brief relationship last year.

“From my perspective, it has never been RECALLING the fights, the breakup, the disappointment over avoidable interviews that made me cry. It was remembering the happy moments that were so fleeting, but so special because they were so “normal,” Kris wrote.

She added, “He went into my A&A dressing room on our 2nd telecast and said: “Ms. Aquino, may I have your number?”

Kris shared how she avoided things and places that reminded her of the relationship.

“We spoke of building a life together, actually set a time frame, in this restaurant in Greenbelt that I frequented because of their steaks and burgers, but I’ve also never eaten there again. I cut off more than 18 inches of my hair because I wanted to forget how I must have looked with hair all over my face & pillow, when he used to surprise me by waking me up and bringing me my venti nonfat latte with no foam, just because his day would be so hectic and early morning was the only time he could see me, regardless of my still being fast asleep.”

The proposal

Kris revealed that Herbert asked her to marry him on the first Friday of April 2014 because he wanted to be with someone he can spend the rest of his life with.

“This is the first time i’ll publicly acknowledge this, because I can now recall with absolutely no bitterness or regrets; on the first Friday of April nearly a year ago during merienda, he said he was tired, he didn’t want to play games, he was tired of chasing and of running away, and he wanted to feel secure with someone he could grow old with. He said, walang romance, walang lokohan, walang bolahan. Okay na raw ba ko to marry him kasi nga PAGOD na sya?”.

The proposal was simple, but Kris did not mind because she “wanted to grow old with him.”

Kris and Herbert came from unsuccessful relationships. She was married to basketball player James Yap, while Herbert has been separated from his longtime partner.

No 'I love you'

“I remember laughing and saying that was probably the least romantic proposal any woman has ever received, but because we were so similar in our weirdness, I was in agreement; I wanted to grow old with him because I knew we’d never be bored conversing, and maybe this was where God led 2 individuals who deserved a chance at life long companionship with maturity, and full acceptance of equally colorful pasts,” she said.

On hindsight, Kris realized “he never said he loved me” even if they were talking about a future together.

“The next day he had dinner with my family, and I cried during our heart to heart talk after that first attempt at introducing him to my family. I said I realized he never said he loved me, he was simply tired, and I didn’t want to be his version of Salonpas, Alaxan, Ben Gay, or a massage. He cried too and said he was scared, overwhelmed, afraid of being branded a “user” when he has given the majority of his life to public service, and maybe we should take a step back,” she recalled.

On April 7, Kris broke her silence about her relationship with Herbert, saying that they are partners taking a “chance at forever.”

However, Kris said Herbert broke up with her over the phone the next day.

Rejection

“I made the mistake of speaking about him the following night on A&A. The next day, over the phone he broke up with me, right before Bimb’s 7th birthday party.”

After some time, Kris and Herbert became friends again. Herbert called Kris on February 15, a day after ejr birthday, but she didn’t take his call.

“Bimb saw his name flashing on my phone, and he told me: “Mama, go ahead talk to him because when you talk to him, you get happy. But remember after, you get so sad and I hate seeing you cry. And BOOM, that was my wake up call, my long avoided wisdom coming from the innocence of my 7 year old,” Kris said.
That’s when the TV host realized things will never be the same between her and Herbert.
“I realized as much as I want us to be friends, we can’t. There were just too many promises that my heart so desperately wanted to believe in. And continuing the friendship will continue to make me long for what wasn’t meant to be.”

Rejection taught Kris lessons about love and life.

Lesson in humility 

“And maybe this was what this whole experience of trying to love again was meant to teach me, to be HUMBLE that for a man not ready to commit, I WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH.”

She’s still praying for a special someone she can share her love with.

“Yes in all honesty, I still pray for someone who can be my strength. I still pray for someone to talk to at the end of a long day, someone who will listen, and someone who will also teach me new things, challenging my mind, and mirroring my values. Someone to pray with and pray for. Someone I can trust with all my fears, someone who accepts my past, and still looks forward to our future. And someone who won’t be tired about love, but will accept, nurture, and treasure what we will share.”

Kris recalled how her mother, the late President Cory Aquino, raised her to be strong and “stand alone.”

She said that rejection made her appreciate the love other people have for her.

True love 

“I needed for my love to be declined for me to value those who accept my love with so much gratitude, and I needed to realize this important life truth: True love doesn’t find you, neither do you find it. You build true love together, and you can’t do that when you’re tired, jaded, or weary. Love is built by those who have inspiration, determination, fortitude, trustworthiness, loyalty, courage, childlike faith, openness, enthusiasm, and enchantment with what is, plus all that will be.”

Kris added, “To now paraphrase my mom: And love can only make you the best possible version of yourself. I was spared birthday blues maybe because God said: NATUTO NA SYA, OKAY NA YAN, SIGURO NAMAN MAG-IINGAT NA…”

 

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