Nordstrom is selling fake mud jeans for the unbelievably low price of $425
Great news, fashionistas — your wildest denim dreams are about to come true.
Nordstrom is taking the super stylish trend of completely destroying normal jeans and then selling them as ~super unique~ items of clothing to a whole other level with *drumroll please* fake mud jeans!
SEE ALSO: Dear Topshop, stop trying to make clear plastic jeans happen. Love, the internet.
If you're asking yourself what in the world fake mud jeans are, you're overthinking this — for fake mud jeans are exactly as they sound: jeans featuring fake mud.
This may sound silly at first, but fake mud jeans are a luxury perhaps even more prestigious than ripped jeans. We know this because Nordstrom is selling them for $425, which proves they must be phenomenal.
Faded jeans with holes in them used to sound like the dumbest idea of all time, so fake mud jeans will probably make billions. @Nordstrom
— Mike Welch (@RealMikeWelch) April 25, 2017
The "Barracuda Straight Leg Jeans" are carefully described as comfortable "heavily distressed medium-blue denim" pants for men that "embody rugged, Americana workwear that's seen some hard-working action with a crackled, caked-on muddy coating that shows you're not afraid to get down and dirty."
OOOOoooh weeee! Sounds hot, hot, hot and does not resemble poop one bit!
Image: nordstrom
Image: nordstrom
The jeans gained attention after Mike Rowe of Dirty Jobs, a clear expert on both dirt and hard work, ranted about them on Facebook. With utter confusion, Rowe considered the troubling message the expensive jeans were sending consumers, and called out Nordstrom for carrying them.
"Forget the jeans themselves for a moment, and their price, and look again at the actual description. 'Rugged Americana' is now synonymous with a 'caked-on, muddy coating.' Not real mud. Fake mud. Something to foster the illusion of work. The illusion of effort," Rowe wrote. "They’re a costume for wealthy people who see work as ironic — not iconic."
Sure the price is steep and the jeans are offensive, but hey, if you still long to be fashionable and don't have an extra $425 to spare, you can easily create your own knock-off pair of mud jeans by putting on regular jeans and I guess just rolling around in some mud.
Who on earth goes out and buys a 500$ pair of fake mud jeans from Nordstrom when you can get a cheap pair and drag them through the mud?
— Ryan (@Ryandizzl3) April 25, 2017
Don't buy #Nordstrom's mud jeans, just send your jeans to me and I will put local artisanal craft mud on them for $200 #isthishowyoubusiness
— Dave Shaffer (@flanger001) April 25, 2017
anyone who feels the need to buy @Nordstrom mud jeans for $425 buy a cheap pair of jeans and I'll throw you in the mud for free
— JadedByPolitics (@JadedByPolitics) April 25, 2017
Nordstrom also specifically states to machine wash the jeans in cold water and hang them to dry, but pro tip: anyone who's truly not afraid to get down and dirty knows washing is unnecessary.
