Advertisement

Life's better with a Christmas sweater – and it doesn't have to be horribly naff

Life's better with a Christmas sweater – and it doesn't have to be horribly naff - Shutterstock 
Life's better with a Christmas sweater – and it doesn't have to be horribly naff - Shutterstock

There is a photograph, a still from a famous film, that all reputable men’s style columns are required by law to publish at this time of year alongside a Grinchy story decrying the tradition of the novelty Christmas jumper — and I shall be very cross indeed with the Telegraph picture desk if you are not looking at that photo right now.

Since it’s here in front of you, you will know already that the picture is of Colin Firth in a green rollneck, with a torso-covering red-nosed reindeer emblazoned across it. As you also know already, it’s from Bridget Jones’s Diary, from all of 19 years ago, and Firth is making a spectacle of himself as the priggish lawyer Mark Darcy.

His squirming discomfort is, of course, what makes the scene funny, because the novelty Christmas jumper is the great yuletide leveler: no one, not even that handsome smoothie Colin Firth, can look cool in a jumper that appears to have been knitted by his mad maiden aunt, after one too many passes of the mulled wine tray.

And since Christmas is not supposed to be cool, it’s supposed to be cosy and comforting, the novelty jumper does double duty, by bringing such pompous asses as Mark Darcy back down to earth for a moment.

This column is not here to advocate for the most egregious examples of the phenomenon, which envelop the middle aged male paunch in scenes better suited to greeting cards. But the fact is that after this wretched year we could all use a laugh, and it so happens that we’re in luck: the jolly knitted sweater for men is all of a sudden extremely trendy, with many of the big-name designer brands producing knitwear in a riot of colours and patterns, and the high street obligingly following suit.

The most eye catching of the high fashion festive sweaters is from Gucci designer Alessandro Michele: a thick wool and alpaca-blend pullover, in rich red, decorated with the face of Mickey Mouse and the repeated Gucci double-G logo (£870). Not to be outdone,

Prada has a fetching intarsia wool sweater, in a geometric pattern of yellow, red and black (£695). Other Italian luxury labels — Loro Piana, Canali, Brunello Cucinelli — offer colourful sweaters in cashmere, merino wool and more.

More affordably, Gap has a Fair Isle knit in navy, red and green (£49.95), Next does a Marl-pattern zip-neck (£34) and M&S has gone to town on Christmas prints: if you have a Mark Darcy in your life, I suggest buying him the green cotton crewneck with a sunglasses-wearing Santa on the belly (£19.50). He won’t look cool, by any means. But, even if it must be by force, he will be spreading some much-needed Christmas cheer.

Alex Bilmes is editor in chief of Esquire.

Textured fair isle, £195, Gant
Textured fair isle, £195, Gant

Textured fair isle, £195, Gant

Santa Christmas jumper, £19.50, Marks & Spencer 
Santa Christmas jumper, £19.50, Marks & Spencer

Santa Christmas jumper, £19.50, Marks & Spencer

Navy fair isle, £90, Barbour
Navy fair isle, £90, Barbour

Navy fair isle, £90, Barbour

Slim-fit fair isle, £315, MP Massimo Piombo
Slim-fit fair isle, £315, MP Massimo Piombo

Slim-fit fair isle, £315, MP Massimo Piombo (mrporter.com)

Lambswool fair isle, £143, J Crew
Lambswool fair isle, £143, J Crew

Lambswool fair isle, £143, J Crew