First Date Venues: Avoid These Rookie Mistakes

Cinema
Cinema
Photo: 123RF

Sometimes, you just can’t score a date beyond the first and it leaves you bewildered and confused. You did everything right, so what went wrong?

It might have to do with the venue. The setting of your date determines the atmosphere, and that in turn affects the chemistry and spark. Without that spark, your date wouldn’t be inclined to say yes to a second meeting.

These are six venues that you always thought were acceptable but are actually oh, so wrong.

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1. The movies

It’s almost become a pop culture stereotype that a standard first date choice should always be at the movies, but we’re here to bust this myth once and for all.

A first date is meant to establish a connection between you and your date so that both of you can make a better decision as to whether you’d like to meet for a second time and so on. Movies are like a blaring distraction from that very purpose.

How much would you actually chat with a virtual stranger sitting next to you in the cinema? You end up knowing a lot more about the film you just caught than your actual date.

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2. Dinner

Another first date stereotype that needs to stop right now is the need to bring her out for a fancy dinner.

It’s not uncommon to hear of a first date faltering because of how the conversation peters out. While this is, of course, a function of the chemistry you have with your date, the setting plays a huge role too.

While dinner may look romantic, it could feel more like a job interview than an actual date because of the formality that is conventionally associated with dinner. Instead, ask her out for a no-strings-attached coffee or a brunch.

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3. A club

Even if both of you are party animals on the inside, a club is no place to make a first step in any budding new relationship.

We can barely hear ourselves think in a club, and any conversation that requires triple the energy to make yourselves heard over the music isn’t going to flourish into anything meaningful.

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4. Hanging out with friends

We can’t think of anything more awkward than having your first date within a group outing. You’d be constantly choosing between interacting with your date and your friends, and she’d probably be overwhelmed with the barrage of new people that she has to meet.

Instead, introduce her to your friends after some mutual interest has been established, and always ask her if she’s comfortable with it before going ahead and making plans.

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5. A place associated with your childhood

This option is fine if your purpose here is to introduce her to a hidden gem of a place that only those living around the area would know about.

This option is not OK if you’re going to spend the whole date regaling her with your entire history from birth to your teenage girlfriends and what you spent your time doing as a five-year-old in that same area.

Remember that relationships are always a two-way street, and plunging your date in nothing else but your own personal history can come across as being self-centered and having no interest in the person you’re trying to converse with.

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6. Your house

If you live with your parents, this might introduce the family factor into your budding relationship way too early and it could scare her away.

If you live alone, or happen to be alone at that period, it might also send out the wrong signals and it could scare her away if that isn’t what she’s looking for. Furthermore, you’re virtually a stranger to her and she has no reason to trust you enough to put herself in your personal space.

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