One of the basic premise of a healthy relationship is friendly banter about sex. This not only helps couples to know each other better, but also add spice into the bedroom. In fact, experts suggest that having an intimate conversation can make the sexual experience even more enjoyable.
Now, if you’re just starting out on the ‘bedroom chat’ and wondering where to begin, worry not. We have you covered. We’re sharing some intimate conversation examples and ways in which you can start it off with your partner.
But first, let’s discuss the elephant in the room.
Why Sex Talk is Important?
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One of the best ways to prevent boredom and breathe new life into the bedroom is to have healthy sex talk. After all, it is important to explore your sexual boundaries together.
Unfortunately, many couples hesitate to communicate with each other in bed and end up not knowing their partner’s likes and dislikes.
However, discussing your boundaries can not only give you new ideas to try in the bedroom, it can also help you develop better communication skills, deeper trust, and greater intimacy.
Start with these intimate conversations that are sure you to help you know each other better, in the bedroom.
Intimate Conversation You Must Have With Your Partner
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1. Sex- at the right time!
A healthy conversation about sex should a regular occurrence and not a once-in-a-while conversation. From frequency to fantasies to role play and everything in between. You should be able to communicate these things with your partner. But it is also crucial to gauge their mindset and if they are in the correct headspace to talk about it as well.
Because such conversations only work when both partners are willing to exchange on the same level. If not, you’ll need to respect and understand their mood as well. Find the best time to know about your partner’s fantasies and desires.
2. Experiments in the bedroom
Prepping a sexual wish list is a good way to begin. It can lead to deeper conversations and exciting new bedroom rituals. According to sex educator, Haylin Belay, program coordinator at Girls Inc. NYC, “Some couples spend years having ‘okay’ sex only to discover that their partner secretly wanted all the same things they did, but didn’t feel comfortable talking about any of them.”
Some ideas that you can include in your sexual bucket list should include toys, dressing up for role play, and even utilising the different corners of your room. Begin by asking your partner what makes them ‘tingle.’ And if there is something you can do to help elevate that experience.
And when you do talk about experiments in your bedroom, do lay out your sexual limits clearly.
3. When you are just not ‘in the mood’
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While sex is a very enjoyable experience, sometimes you or your partner may not be in a mood. This is totally normal. But don’t use this as an opportunity to shame. Using language such as “You’re always” or “You never…” isn’t helpful. Instead, ask them what’s bothering them and how you can help.
Some days a simple massage or just a warm hug suffices and these gestures are an indication of the strong bond between couples.
4. Frequency of sex
Considering the busy lives which we all have today, you should also discuss how often you want to have sex. The reason this is important is because you may have a different expectation from your partner.
It is better to be on the same page, otherwise, you may quickly start to feel unsatisfied. While it may sound boring to mark a day on the calendar as your ‘sex day’, but knowing you’re going to have sex later will put you in the sex-mindset all day long. You can check with your partner on this date too. “Hey, do you want to do it tonight. Should I mark it as our special date?” is a good way to begin.
5. When you need help
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If sexual desire wanes, you need to address it. We often take medical help when we face any problem related to our health. But sexual health goes unnoticed and people even feel ashamed talking about it.
But the fact is that low sexual drive places undesired pressure in your life: be it emotional, social, or psychological. Changes in the sexual desires of either partner, if left unresolved, may even create problems in the relationship.
Which is why, looking after your sexual wellness is equally important, as it can help you feel relaxed and satisfied. Focus on the positives while talking about what may not work.
Healthy couples are able to communicate this with each other too and it helps boost their confidence too.
So if you’re wondering whether or not you should have an intimate conversation with your partner, think not. Do it now and cement your bond with your partner.