The CDC Says Vaccinated People Can Resume Normal Activities. People Are Excited.
Friends, countrymen, everyone who has lived this masked life we've been living for 14 months—listen up. We have something to share. Damnit. There's no perfect way to do this. Just read and weep the happiest tears you've ever wept. From the CDC:
If you are fully vaccinated, you can resume activities that you did prior to the pandemic... Fully vaccinated people can resume activities without wearing a mask or physically distancing, except where required by federal, state, local, tribal, or territorial laws, rules, and regulations, including local business and workplace guidance.
That's right. It's the news we've been waiting for since March 2020: Fully vaccinated people can finally begin to return to a semblance of normal. Seeing your neighbors. Playing soccer. Buying toothpaste at CVS without breaking an anxious sweat. We don't know. It's been so long. What do we even do? Go hug someone. (Someone fully vaccinated. Only if you're fully vaccinated.) See your grandparents. Your grandkids. Do the thing you've been wanting to do since the world shut down, when you baked bread and told yourself it was therapy, and stared in the mirror and wondered what the hell lethargy means and if you, in fact, are lethargic.
No. Not anymore. Thursday's news from the CDC represents one of the first significant steps in our return to non-pandemic life. Naturally, people are pretty damn excited about it. Here are the best reactions we've seen to the miraculous CDC report:
Fully Vaxed walking into the weekend like this after the new @CDCgov guidelines. #cdcguidlines pic.twitter.com/csctuID1UT
— Kyle Morgan (@KyleDotMorgan) May 13, 2021
The CDC: fully vaccinated people can stop wearing masks
The bottom half of my face: pic.twitter.com/7JmzYUcNho— Rose Dommu (@rosedommu) May 13, 2021
Every where: CDC says vaccinated people don’t need to wear mask
Floridians: wait, y’all still were wearing mask? pic.twitter.com/TjqJHWKeYA— Nicolette (@NicoTuco21) May 13, 2021
The CDC says you can now travel to Sweden for a summer festival, hang out with a cult, and put your boyfriend in a bear suit and set him on fire.
— Michelle Swope (@RedheadfromMars) May 13, 2021
CDC said I don’t have to wear a bra ever again either
— Ayo Edebiri (@ayoedebiri) May 13, 2021
The CDC announced that fully vaccinated Americans no longer need to add "socially distanced, of course!!" to every social media post
— Casey Newton (@CaseyNewton) May 13, 2021
CDC: fuck it mask off pic.twitter.com/Wk2GzehrFa
— Seinfeld Current Day (@Seinfeld2000) May 13, 2021
CDC also mentioned that it's okay to call someone "buddy" or "friend" if you can't remember their name after a year of lockdown. I don't think that's getting enough attention, but I understand.
— Bill Chopik (@Chops310) May 13, 2021
cdc says that men who wear shorts must adhere to a maximum 7-inch inseam. i’m sorry, i don’t make the rules.
— b-boy bouiebaisse (@jbouie) May 13, 2021
Ok but when is the CDC going to cancel my student loans?!? pic.twitter.com/TEqkN4Lzo7
— Gabriel (@gabrielr925) May 13, 2021
CDC now says vaccinated Americans are no longer required to preface every email with five versions of "how *are* you" or "hope you're well" before starting actual message https://t.co/ucxxOvfG1b
— Lauren Goode (@LaurenGoode) May 13, 2021
cdc says the floor is no longer lava
— Nicky Woolf (@NickyWoolf) May 13, 2021
The CDC says someone already did your joke
— R/GA (@RGA) May 13, 2021
The CDC says fully vaccinated people can DROP EVERYTHING NOW. MEET ME IN THE POURING RAIN. KISS ME ON THE SIDEWALK. TAKE AWAY THE PAIN. CAUSE I SEE SPARKS FLY WHENEVER YOU SMILE’
— Phillip (@MajorPhilebrity) May 13, 2021
The CDC still advises against posting full-length news articles in the Facebook comments
— Max Chesnes (@MaxChesnes) May 13, 2021
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