'Avengers' Cast Read Kid-Friendly 'Infinity War' Adaptation -- But Get Bleeped

Jackie Willis‍

These superheroes have potty mouths!

On Monday's episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live, the cast of the Avengers movies teamed up to read aloud a more kid-friendly version of the PG-13 movie Avengers: Infinity War. "Grown adults left the theater crying,” host Jimmy Kimmel said upon introducing the story time. In the conclusion ofthe 2018 film, the villain Thanos (Josh Brolin) kills half of the universe’s life force.

"While children love superheroes, I’m not so sure how they feel about intergalactic genocide," Kimmel added. "It’s no fun to see Spider-Man die. To get the kids back, we wrote a version of that movie that’s kid-friendly, a children’s book, and we asked the Avengers themselves to read it for us."

The Hulk himself, Mark Ruffalo, kicked off the fire-side segment, telling viewers, "Good evening and welcome to intellectual, dialectical theater of the absurd. Tonight’s performance will be an excerpt from Twas the Mad Titan Thanos."

Ruffalo's superhero co-stars, Scarlett Johansson, Chris Hemsworth, Don Cheadle and Jeremy Renner (who was not in Infinity War but other Avengers films), also read from the story book, but had a hard time keeping their comments G-rated. 

Hemsworth, who plays Thor in the films, got called out by his co-stars when they got to the part in the story where Thor decides to aim for Thanos' chest rather than his head, costing the lives of much of the universe. 

"Yeah, he blew it," Johansson says.

"F**k Thor," Ruffalo adds, getting bleeped. 

Attempting to defend himself, Hemsworth notes, "At least I got close enough to actually go for something, unlike the rest of the pathetic, little, useless Avengers."

In addition to story time, Johansson and Hemsworth joined their Avengers: Endgame co-stars, Paul Rudd and Robert Downey Jr., for a joint interview on JKL, where they discussed everything from cast tattoos to the upcoming Black Widow movie. 

"I have a scratch-n-sniff with Paul Rudd’s face on it," Hemsworth quipped when asked about his ink. 

As for the Black Widow movie, Johansson played coy, and wouldn't even acknowledge that a solo film for her character was in the works. 

David Harbour, however, addressed the rumors that he'll be co-starring alongside Johansson in the flick when he spoke to ET earlier this month. 

"Yeah man, like, I want to do the movie," the Stranger Things star admitted.

He later quipped, "[Marvel would] kick me out so fast…[if I reveal anything]. Look here's what I will say. It's being directed by this woman Kate Shortland who is a phenomenal director. She directed a movie called Lore. She's a phenomenal director, so what's really exciting to me about it is it's gonna be like a real deep, interesting film. And so yeah, I'm just excited for it as a film as well as a superhero movie."

Avengers: Endgame hits theaters on April 26.

Here's more with the cast:

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