These 12 Romantic Quotes Are Every Cynic’s Wet Dream

Love is like cheap caramel: it needs a little salt to bring out the flavour.

So whether you’re trying to impress someone with no faith in humanity, or just in need of something to rinse your mouth of St. Valentine’s cloying sweetness, here are 12 anti-love quotes from the world’s wisest philosophers.

“A man is only as faithful as his options.”
Chris Rock

“You text him. He doesn’t text back. He was obviously so excited to see the text that he fainted.”
Random person on internet

“Women were brought up to believe that men were the answer. They weren’t. They weren’t even one of the questions.”
Julian Barnes

“I measured love by the extent of my jealousy.”
Graham Greene

“Don’t marry the person you think you can live with. Marry the person you can’t live without. But no matter your choice, you will probably regret it anyway.”
SAF Safety Message, Bukit Panjang Camp, 2016

“What are men to rocks and mountains?”
Jane Austen

“When poverty walks through the door, love jumps out the window.”
Dutch Proverb

“I am a cage, in search of a bird.”
Franz Kafka

“You need a very small space to have sex.”
Minister Josephine Teo

“No matter how much you think you love somebody, you’ll step back when the pool of their blood edges up too close.”
Chuck Palahniuk

“Love is so short, forgetting is so long.”
Pablo Neruda

“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”
Charles M. Schulz

“If they think you admire them, they will admire you because of your good taste, and when they admire you, you have an illusion for a moment that there’s something to admire.”
Graham Greene (Again)

“If you can’t handle me at my worst, then good for you; I commend and respect you for setting healthy boundaries.”
Some girl on Twitter

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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